Challenging Self Criticism
May 31st, 2021
My greatest fear is that I am not good enough. It’s a pretty common fear and for me, it is an Automatic Negative Thought when certain types of conflict arise. I blame myself, making myself feel small and unworthy.
I have spent years trying to improve my self-esteem and even though there has been great progress, when something bad happens, I still revert right back to thinking it’s my fault and I am not "good enough" when encountering certain types of situations. It often comes up when I have unmet needs.
Recently I discovered a reflection activity that has proven priceless to unpacking these emotionally charged and familiar thought patterns.
To do the activity you need a piece of paper and a pencil or pen.
- You name the negative thought at the top.
-
Then draw two columns leaving some room at the bottom of the page
- The left column is called "Evidence For"
- The right column is called "Evidence Against"
- In these columns, write out all of the evidence for and against this negative thought.
- At the bottom of the page, you can then reframe the thought in a more loving way, integrate compassion and acceptance into your understanding of what happened.
You can download the printable template I use.
I’d love any feedback you have; if it works for you or if you use another type of activity to work through these types of emotions.