Presence & Intentionally Taking Breaks

I have a tendency to overwork: it’s too easy, too compelling, too people pleasing, and too satisfying to complete tasks from the never-ending to-do list. Left to my default programming, I can get too into work to the point where I have a hard time stopping or taking a break. Some might call it flow, though for me and many other neurodivergent people, this is often a state of hyperfocus.

Often by the time I realize I need to take a break, it’s been too long already and I have neglected to care for myself in some way. Usually I have forgotten to eat, forgotten to go to the bathroom and am emotionally exhausted. Through trial and error, these are the ingredients and recipe that help me to come back home to my body and the present moment.

Coming Back to the Present

Reset your senses to start feeling a shift.

Sight
Look at something that calms you or shifts your train of thought. I like to put on magenta colored glasses as a signal that it’s break time. Take a look out the window, or better yet step outside and get some fresh air and feel the sun on your skin.

Sound
If you are listening to music, take a break or change it to be something that will help you connect to your breath and body. I have certain songs I like to listen to on repeat when I need a reset.

Smell
Scents have a large connection to emotion. Making a point to smell something that is calming and soothing when taking a break really helps me recenter. I often reach for lavender essential oil. Candles and incense are other options I find helpful.

Taste
Making a point to have a bit of chocolate or some tea to engage the sense of taste to bring you back to yourself. I don’t always need to eat (but often do!) when taking a break, but having a taste in my mouth is a great way to interrupt stubborn thoughts.

Touch
Finding tactile sensations is another grounding technique. I have soft blankets and natural textures around our home, so when I am taking a break, I seek them out. Additionally, this is a great time to pet cats or dogs and bond. Touch can also be sensation or pressure. Weighted blankets help me to feel calmer right away.

Body Awareness
Reconnecting to your body and it’s needs is the core of presence. A quick scan to see how your corporal form is doing often reveals your next action. Whether it’s a bathroom break, a stretch, or realizing your clothes are making you uncomfortable, listen to what your body is telling you it needs.

My Step-by-Step process

• Put on magenta glasses
• Play reset music in noise cancelling headphones
• Go to the bathroom
• Drink water (even if I am not thirsty)
• Check temperature. Am I cold or warm? Adjust clothing if needed.
• Check comfort. Are my clothes comfortable? Is my environment? Adjust as needed.
• Take deep belly breaths
• Taste something
• Pet kitteh/doggo or touch something soft or comforting.
• Get under a weighted blanket.
• Distract your mind with something light and pleasurable. For me, it’s often a few minutes of video games.
• Dance, stretch or just move your body in a way that feels good
• If you’re having a hard time, take a nap or at least lie down and rest for 20 minutes. I usually listen to music while doing this.

Preventing Hyperfocus

Start your working sessions by being intentional. Have your plan or be clear on what you are trying to accomplish in the next 20-30 minutes. Set a timer. For me, I use a visual timer that goes from green to yellow to red to indicate how much of the cycle I have left. When the timer is up, do a quick check in the body for if anything is needed. Working in small cycles helps me to stay better connected to my needs and improves my mood. It then takes less recovery time to move on to my next task or activity.

A few notes:
While I do like to feel accomplished and productive, I reject the notion of productivity hacking or endlessly optimizing for productivity gains. There is no reward for who works the most — other than burnout. Working too much will cause regret later in life: we are human beings, not human doings. We are here to experience life, not to accomplish tasks. Capitalism equates output with worth and productivity with value. It does not want you to slow down, take a moment to breathe and enjoy the present moment. Resist the default messaging about rest: it is productive. Our mental capacity and emotions are not infinite.

So please, take the break and choose to be present with yourself.

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